Girls Write Out
Tuesday, July 17, 2007

The longer I live the more I realize people are basically divided into two groups. Behind-the-Scene People and Stage People. I'm behind the scenes, but occaisionally I peek outside the big velvet curtain. Playing drums for instance is a huge step onto the stage even if I do hide behind my kit and wear fade-into-the-background black when I play.

I'm the person who volunteers to make name tags and paint the scenery for the play. It's okay--that's just who I am. I do love watching the Stage People, though. I love hearing what they say and seeing how they act. What I do not like is that Stagers seem impervious to the fact that we Sceners are quite happy where we are--hiding behind the nearest potted plant. Hey, I look good in geraniums.

If you're a Behind-the-Scener married to, or friends with, a Stager, you've experienced this phenomenon. Likely, you have been dragged kicking and screaming into the spotlight. Many times. These Stagers do not know how we Sceners feel. They plan get-acquainted games that have us looking for the nearest exit, they ask us to give an impromptu speech (ACK!) as if it's no big thing. Note to Stagers: IT IS A VERY BIG THING.

What's not a very big thing (even for a Scener like me) is posting a little comment. Even on the public internet stage, this is okay, because we're hiding behind a computer, right? The next best thing to a potted geranium. So, I hearby declare today Lurker Day! If you're a Behind-the-Scener--otherwise known as a lurker--will you take five seconds and post a comment? Just say "hi"? (non-lurkers welcome too)
It's okay to peek outside the curtain. We won't bite. Promise. And now, on with the show . . .
Denise Hunter  
posted at 8:45 AM  
  Comments (30)
Delicious Delicious
At 10:59 PM, Blogger Deena said...

Denise, Diann, Kristen, and Colleen: Thank you all for the high quality Christian novels you write. I enjoy every word, and my life is enriched by the creativity you all pour out on each page. I love your stories, and I love you all too.

At 11:10 PM, Blogger Georgiana D said...

I'm a semi-lurker. (Lurker sounds so lewd!) I do enjoy your blog and the many colorful comments you receive each day.

BTW, I loathe get-acquainted games. Shudder.

At 11:35 PM, Blogger Pam S. said...

The first time I realized there were "scene" and "stage" people was when my friend Helen ("scene") YELLED at me ("stage") for trying to include her in a class discussion. "I'll talk when I have something to say!" she yelled at me (after the class). Until that moment, it never occurred to me that she didn't want my "help." Talk about an eye-opening experience!

Thanks for the reminder today about honoring our friends for who they are.

At 6:21 AM, Blogger Tracy Ruckman said...

Awwww - you spotted another Scener!!

I love these designations - so accurate. I raised two boys - one of each! Talk about putting ME in a difficult spot.

Great post.

At 7:13 AM, Blogger Colleen Coble said...

Yeah but you Behind the Sceners NEED us Stagers to drag you out into the light of day. Especially when we want to showcase your awesome books!

At 7:45 AM, Blogger Denise Hunter said...

Welcome Lurkers and semi-lurkers! It's good to hear from you!

C, we do not need you Stagers dragging us into the spotlight! Showcase the book not the author. LOL
Tell her, Di.

At 7:50 AM, Blogger Katy McKenna said...

I am a closet stager, married to a scener who constantly finds himself on stage. He's a business owner by day, and a musician by night. He's been in the "lights" for the 30 years we've been married, while I've stayed in the background in a supporting role.

He REALLY likes taking me to parties, though. And I get a kick out of hearing people say, after I've accidentally entertained them, "Katy, we never KNEW this about you....." :)

Katy McKenna

At 8:23 AM, Blogger Andrea said...

Last week, I came out of lurkdom. I am glad I did. I enjoy the blog. It's a fun way to start my day!

I am definitely a behind-the-scener. My pastor husband is a stager.I hate it when he tries to put the light on me. He has finally learned to leave me behind the scenes when possible.

At 8:47 AM, Blogger Diann Hunt said...

You're right, D! Although it's kind of nice to have a stager around to hide behind. Colleen is definitely a stager. She can sell my books while I hide behind her and eat chocolate. It's a win-win situation. *g*

To our readers: The four of us our a mix of stagers/lurkers. Any idea who is what? ;-)

At 12:43 PM, Blogger Rachel Hauck said...

Okay, who of the gwo is lurker? Di, Denise. ;)

Colleen is the stager. ;) But she's so humble and generous with her gift with people.

Kristin, I think, is a semi-lurker.

So funny you blogged this Denise. Last night I told Tony how I've learned that while I"m an open book, for the most part, most people are not. Even remotely. If I'm embarrassed or outed, I'll survive. Get over it.

But for lurkers, it's not the same. Personal things are just that, personal, deep, don't share with anyone, even another good friend.

While I'm commited to keeping confidences and being a woman of honor, I realized I need to go to an even deep committment.

When very shy or private people share things with me, I want to realize how hard, perhaps, it was for them to open up.

We need lurkers to remind us that holding things close to the heart is important. We don't have to share everything.

We need stagers to remind us letting go can be fun!

Love to the GWO!


At 1:59 PM, Blogger Jaime said...

So hey - I'm totally a stager, my husband is a scener. Drives me CRAZY because i want to play, play play and he's so serious and calculated and private. Sometimes I flash the spotlight on him just for the hilarious reaction I receive and then I quick swing it off. We stagers can be major antagonists!! LOL!!!

At 3:00 PM, Blogger Ane Mulligan said...

I pamper my Behind-the-Scenes people. I wouldn't dream of making them play those games. I let them be the scorekeeprs or whatever they want, even if it's just laugh at the On-Stage people. :o] Those people are the most IMPORTANT people in the theatre! Without them, the show doesn't go on.

At 3:06 PM, Blogger Ane Mulligan said...

Oh, and Di, it's an easy guess. Kristin and Colleen are the Stagers, while you and Denise are the lurkers. :o)

At 3:10 PM, Blogger Colleen Coble said...

Oh and Ane, it's not as easy as you think. Rachel is right, K is a semi-lurker. She'll take the stage but it's got to be on her own terms and for a good reason. LOL She likes attention but only the RIGHT KIND of attention. :-)

At 3:35 PM, Blogger Diann Hunt said...

Rachel, it's possible to be a lurker and still an open book. That's me. I'm pretty much out there with who I truly am. Just read my books. Parts of me are peeking throughout those pages. I'm a total goof, don't have a classy bone in my body (though I try so hard), but like a cocker spaniel if you'll be my friend I'll be loyal to the death. *g*

At 5:58 PM, Blogger Eileen said...

So I'll peek from behind the curtain and tell you four how much I love what you do!

At 6:50 PM, Blogger Tricia said...

How funny that you posted about this today.

I blogged on my blog today, that I have been outed. People in my real life now know I write, and put it on the internet. ACK!!

I like to write, but now people are going to read it, and possible have opinions, and judge.

I'm running for the nearest potted geranium! What was I thinking going out onto the stage? I am most defiantly a scener!

At 7:58 PM, Blogger Denise Hunter said...

Tricia, take a deep breath and smile. That's all you can do at this point. I remember freaking when I finally got a yes on my first book. It suddenly hit me that people were going to read my words. ACK!

Thanks for chiming in lurkers! See, it was kinda fun, huh?

At 8:39 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

C, if you're calling me a control freak -- hello pot!

At 9:26 PM, Blogger Colleen Coble said...

K, not everything is a subtext. LOL haven't you learned Hoosiers say what they mean? Sheesh. You aren't a control freak.I meant you only take the stage when you feel safe--on your own terms when something isn't expected of you that overwhelms you.

Sheesh, some people's children!

At 7:20 AM, Blogger AE said...

I'm a stager or scener, depending on the situation. Put me in front of an audience - big or small and I'm fine.

But posting an opinion on a blog or cooking a casserole to take to church and I run screaming back into my closet.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to kill a spider that I've found behind the broom and mop. Ugh ... so hard to move ... in ... here.

At 7:26 AM, Blogger Lisa Jordan said...

I'm a Behind the Scener who is slowly moving outside the curtain due to a call from God. He has provided me with speaking opportunities and in order to be obedient, I've had to put myself out there to minister to others. My words were His words as I was the vessel He used to deliver the message.

I'm more than happy with lurking. I read quite a few blogs and loops daily, but don't always post. I'm more than happy to coordinate events as long as I don't have to stand in the limelight. I worry about the light shining so brightly that my flaws will glow. LOL.

At 9:34 AM, Blogger allen said...

I guess I'm a bit of both. I have no problem lecturing an art history class of 75 students, but I hate to mingle at parties. I don't like to perform on stage, but I love directing the actors.

At 10:41 AM, Blogger Rachel Hauck said...

Di, you are right. You are very open! I was thinking in context of those lurkers who are not open books. Not that it's a bad thing, but for those of us who are "woo hoo, here I am" it's hard to imagine those who are uncomfortable at the slightest bit of attention.

I grab my nephew the other night for a hug and wanted to pray for him, and his heart was going 100 miles per hour under my hand. Just being the focus of prayer did that to him.

Anyway, just goes to show there are not cliche's in the human condition. So write those characters anyway you want!!

Hugs, Rachel

At 11:54 AM, Blogger Laura said...

Here's one for you.....Try being a lurker (okay, semi-lurker) who was a cheerleader four years of high school AND college! People think that it is no problem to get up in front of a crowd and speak. Sorry, cannot do it!

BTW, love you all! And your books:)

At 11:57 AM, Blogger Lynette Sowell said...

my dh is a Stager. He's adorable. Magnetic. You want to listen to him. My writer buddies who've met him want to keep him to do promotions. He'll just start talking in bookstores...about my books, my friend's books. I'm behind the scenes more with occasional waves from the stage. :) Sometimes I wish I were more like him... but we have a good balance!! :)

At 2:47 PM, Blogger Nan W said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

At 2:57 PM, Blogger Nan W said...

I've been meaning to post comments, really!! (This proves I'm a "scene" person, right?)

I discovered this blog a while back, and love reading about the "goings on" of you wonderful author ladies right in my area, and Kristin too, out in California. Your books have been a blessing, thank you!

(Don't hate me: DeBrand's is only a 10 minute drive away from my home)

At 7:34 PM, Blogger Robin Caroll said...

Laura, I can relate. Everyone assumes I'm a stager, but I'm not. Cheerleading and on every silly committee and such in school gave everyone the impression I love being in the limelight. Not true....

But, Pot and Kettle, I think I do have control issues, which is why I DO step out on stage because I want things done right! LOL I'm such a freak, period! LOL

At 2:16 PM, Blogger Becky said...

Great post, Denise. I definitely identify with sceners.


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The Authors
Kristin Billerbeck
Kristin Billerbeck is a proud Californian, wife, mother of four, and connoisseur of the irrelevant. She writes Christian Chick Lit; where she finds need for most of the useless facts lulling about in her head.

Colleen Coble

Colleen Coble writes romantic suspense with a strong atmospheric element. A lovable animal of some kind--usually a dog--always populates her novels. She can be bribed with DeBrand mocha truffles.

Denise Hunter

Denise Hunter writes women's fiction and love stories with a strong emotional element. Her husband says he provides her with all her romantic material, but Denise insists a good imagination helps too.

Diann Hunt

Diann Hunt writes romantic comedy and humorous women's fiction. She has been happily married forever, loves her family, chocolate, her friends, chocolate, her dog, and well, chocolate.

Hannah Alexander

Cheryl Hodde writes romantic medical suspense under the pen name of Hannah Alexander, using all the input she can get from her husband, Mel, for the medical expertise. For fun she hikes and reads. Out of guilt, she rescues discarded cats. She and Mel are presently taking orders from four pampered strays.

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