Remember that I told you I’m married to the Gadget Man? We’ve had everything from clap on lamps, remotes that we talk to, CD players that come on by themselves, to preprogrammed lights?
Well, this time, my husband has gone too far.
He tells me he's going to the store to buy a trash can for the kitchen. I’m thinking, how sweet that he’s getting me a new trash can--pretty pathetic when I think about it, that I’m feeling all schmaltzy over a trash can.
Since we’re expecting our kids and their families, I rush around the kitchen to prepare for their arrival. Soon my husband returns, the kids arrive, hugs and kisses fly, chatter abounds.
In no time, our son-in-law says, “Wow, that’s a cool trash can, Dad.”
I had forgotten about the new purchase. My suspicions immediately kick in. When a thirty-year-old says a trash can is cool, something’s up. I’ll probably have to say “Keep America Beautiful” and clap three times before it will open.
In checking out our newest gadget, I find it is stainless steel, appropriately sized and very classy, but there’s something else. It has a red button. As I step up to it, the mouth of it opens automatically so one can deposit trash without ever touching the can itself. Simply amazing.
Today I drop a piece of watermelon on the floor and I bend over to pick it up--with my back side toward the trash can--when the Jaws theme song rings in my ears. The mouth of the can opens like a crane on a mission, and I’m thinking in a matter of moments, I’ll be landfill clutter.
Fortunately, my husband saves me from the clutches of this monstrous gadget, and he’s about to become my hero when I see him reward the offensive object with a pat on its shiny top.
Just how well do I
really know this man?
For a moment, the thought of the
Little Shop of Horrors with the man-eating flower gnaws at me--pardon the pun.
If I disappear, please tell me that someone will check our trash can!
Delicious
11 Comments:
What a clever gadget. Now if it would just do your dishes!! Thanks, hubby.
Ha,Ha,Ha,Ha!
Too Funny!
Don't worry we'll send out the troops to look for you if you should become missing!
Does it REALLY play the Jaws theme? If so, I NEED one...for my den, not the kitchen.
Well, okay, Allen, it doesn't really play the Jaws theme song, but I heard it just the same. All I know is, I'm throwing things away in the bathroom. That trash can is my friend.
You're right, E, if it could only do the dishes. This thing would most likely EAT them. *g*
Thanks, Anna Marie, now I can sleep at night!
LOL! My husband thinks we're in the market for a new kitchen trashcan and I HOPE he does NOT see this one! He had one picked out of the Sturbridge Yankee Workshop catalog and was on the verge of ordering it last night when I decided I'd better read the description: "Holds 13-gal. trash bags." Ha! We (correction: I would) be changing the bag twice a day! I say there's nothing wrong with the enormous wicker basket we're currently using...it holds a 30-gal. trash bag just fine. :)
So does this trashcan make my bum look big? lol What a crack up. Sounds like your sweet hubby would make a good character...not that I'm hinting or anything ;)
Shoot, I've been eyeing one of those babies at Sam's, since the foot pedal died on my old one. Now I don't know what to do. I certainly don't want to become landfill fodder!
Oh, that was so funny it brought tears to my eyes!
Perhaps if I had one of those, my kids would try a little harder to get things IN the trash can instead of ON it!
ROFLOLOL! This was just the laugh I needed today! Thanks, Di.
Okay, Deb, mum's the word. Your husband won't hear it from me, I promise.
Julie, there's a bit of my husband in all my male characters. Just not gonna say which bits. LOL
If that thing does devour you, I sure hope you can continue writing your books in there....ha, ha!!
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