Girls Write Out
Tuesday, October 07, 2008

I knew I'd love being a grandma but I had no idea just HOW MUCH. I'm totally obsessed with Alexa. I loved my own kids from the moment they were born, but there's something different about a grandbaby. I've heard that it's because we have time to spend with them but actually I had MORE time when my kids were little because I didn't work. Now I'm rushing toward an approaching deadline. I write a while, look at Alexa's picture, write a while, look at her picture. So it's not time. Maybe it's because I'm older now--GASP--and see the world differently? Any ideas out there.

Anyway, Alexa's arrival has showed me sometime about God's admonition to love others. And how love covers a multitude of sins. I know I'm going to make mistakes. I've made plenty with my own kids, but they turned out to be great adults who care about other people. I think of my own grandma. I'm sure she made mistakes too but I don't remember a single one. I only remember how much she loved me. I was her first grandchild, but every one of of us grandkids feel the same way about her. She loved us. That's her highest compliment. That knowledge was total bedrock under my feet. Even in the last year before she died, she would pull me down on her lap. She was about 4'10" and I'm 5'9" so that was a sight (I was in my late thirties). But she somehow managed it. I still hear her voice in my head and still think about her every day. If I can be the kind of grandma she was, I'll leave Alexa with a legacy of love. I hold her and stare into those eyes and marvel at the perfection of her cheeks, her bow lips, her dark eyes.

I think that's how God looks at us. We're his creation in an even bigger way than a child or grandchild. He actually created us just like we are. Alexa has enhanced my grasp of God's love in an amazing way.

Has having a child or a grandchild taught you anything? Or you have a story to share about kids or grandparents?
Colleen Coble  
posted at 8:32 AM  
  Comments (11)
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At 9:57 AM, Blogger Sabrina L. Fox said...

I think for me being a mom allows me to heal some of the hurt from my own childhood. I get to be the mom that I always wished I'd had. Ya know? I'm not perfect but I love the relationship I have with my little boy and feel so blessed by it.

On a side note, my mother was a hard woman to live with growing up. Not maternal at all. I used to be so afraid of her and her temperament... However, she treats Tanner like the sun rises when he walks in the room. She adores him and is so sweet to him.

It's shocking to say the least. But interesting how grandchildren change a person. :0/

Dave doesn’t look proud or anything does he? So happy for you, C. And boy does she look like your son. :)

At 10:28 AM, Blogger Diann Hunt said...

I'm with you, C. Grandchildren have taught me about God's love and our capacity to love. I never dreamed I could hold so much love in me for these kids and still have room left over for each one as they arrive into this world!

To say they are a blessing just doesn't pack the punch of the emotional impact they bring to our lives. Just the thought of their pudgy little sticky hands wrapped around my neck turns me to mush.

My life will never be the same.

Happy Grandparenting, C!!

At 10:31 AM, Blogger Diann Hunt said...

Oops, one more thing.

Our grandson (1-1/2 yrs) snuggled into my neck the other day and said, "Awwww, Awwww," an endearing term he uses when cuddling. I told my husband it was at that point in time that my grandson and I entered into an imaginary contract. One that said, "I will give you everything I own from this point on until eternity. All my love, Nanny." *g*

At 11:10 AM, Blogger Krista Phillips said...

She is adorable, Colleen!

I'm only a mother, but I have three girls so I better dad gum be a grandma someday... (However fully hoping that the someday is a loooonnnngggg time from now, my eldest is 8!)

Here are my musings on the difference. I, too, don't think it's time. It might be some wisdom; in fact that's probably a lot of it.

Biggest difference is, in my humble opinion, hormones. As a new mom, I had a very bad case of 'baby blues' for, oh, the first year? *grin* When all you can do is hold your baby and cry, then cry cause you are upset at yourself for crying, it takes something away from the experience and is more than a little stressful.

Then there’s the whole "Oh My Gosh, this little baby is MY responsibility... what if I mess up?!?" and "When will I have a full night's sleep again!?!" Both very stressful feelings.

A grandma doesn't have all that. They just get the pure joy of loving on their grandchild. They can stay over and help with midnight rocking’s, but they don't mind. They know that they'll be able to catch up on sleep soon. They will impact the babies lives, but they don’t have the stress of being the big bad “parent”.

Even as I say this, please know that I LOVE LOVE LOVE being a mommy! I LOVE getting fists full of dandelion flowers, I LOVE getting big messy hugs even when they’re covered in chocolate (or mud…), I LOVE getting mushy, slobbery kisses (especially when they first learn kisses and come to you with their mouth wide open and drool all down their mouth and you need a bath after they annihilate your cheek...)

Yes, being a mommy (and eventually a grandma) is fun stuff!

At 1:09 PM, Blogger Colleen Coble said...

Di, you are a great example of a grandmother to follow! I sure love it!

You might be on to something with that hormone thing, Krista!

At 1:55 PM, Blogger Jaime said...

Gosh! I feel that way about my precious niece Kailey so I don't know what I will feel when its my own!!

At 6:34 PM, Blogger Beth said...

No children for me yet, so I'll share a grandparent story.

My Grandfather recently passed away, but he's always been one of my biggest fans and supporters. He would pray for each of his grandchildren (there are 17 of us and 3 great-grandchildren). I always got a special mention because Grandpa knew I struggled with being single, and he knew what that was like - he didn't marry until he was 29 (quite unusual for his generation). That was my Mum's Dad.

My Dad's Dad was also special. He was a bit of an artist and would draw pictures for us to colour, like ladies in fancy dresses, and tell us stories. He also prayed for us.

So my advice to Grandparents (I know that sounds strange coming from one without any children) is to pray for your grandchildren. We may not say it to you during your lifetime, but we really do value your prayers.

At 6:37 PM, Blogger Colleen Coble said...

That is GREAT, Beth! I agree. I started praying for Alexa way before she was even conceived. And I know my grandma prayed for me.

Good advice!

At 8:06 PM, Blogger Ane Mulligan said...

I think it's a couple of things. One, we're wiser now. At least I like to CLAIM I'm wiser. We've learned that kids' behavior that embarrasses parents is merely being a kid.

Two, I think it has soemthing to do with the continuity of the generations. Someone your child has produced, and that adds something to the equation.

And then there's the plain old thing about how love and acceptance skips generations - you're only responsible to love - unconditionally. Nothing else.

At 2:30 AM, Blogger Kristin said...

My grandmother was the most beautiful woman in the world. She died this year, and I think about her every day. I hear her words of wisdom, think about her humility and service, and I am just so grateful.

My grandmother was hard on me. I was the only girl, Grandpa's girl and she'd raised two girls. She was determined to push me as hard as she could.

I couldn't appreciate the stability she gave me until I was out on my own, and knew how to do things. I remember the taste of Ivory soap and I remember that though she had strict rules, there wasn't anything she wouldn't give up for someone else.

At 9:26 AM, Blogger Pam S. said...

Adopting our daughter was the best lesson I've ever had in understanding about God adopting us as His children. It helped me to begin to understand the depth of His love. In addition, we had a very difficult time in the adoption process since we were trying to meet two countries' regulations and our daughter was a stateless person (long story). It was nothing short of miraculous in the end. Yet what God did--in sacrificing His Son for us--was far more difficult and miraculous.

The pictures of Alexa are precious. :)


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The Authors
Kristin Billerbeck
Kristin Billerbeck is a proud Californian, wife, mother of four, and connoisseur of the irrelevant. She writes Christian Chick Lit; where she finds need for most of the useless facts lulling about in her head.

Colleen Coble

Colleen Coble writes romantic suspense with a strong atmospheric element. A lovable animal of some kind--usually a dog--always populates her novels. She can be bribed with DeBrand mocha truffles.

Denise Hunter

Denise Hunter writes women's fiction and love stories with a strong emotional element. Her husband says he provides her with all her romantic material, but Denise insists a good imagination helps too.

Diann Hunt

Diann Hunt writes romantic comedy and humorous women's fiction. She has been happily married forever, loves her family, chocolate, her friends, chocolate, her dog, and well, chocolate.

Hannah Alexander

Cheryl Hodde writes romantic medical suspense under the pen name of Hannah Alexander, using all the input she can get from her husband, Mel, for the medical expertise. For fun she hikes and reads. Out of guilt, she rescues discarded cats. She and Mel are presently taking orders from four pampered strays.

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