Girls Write Out
Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Well, it's a New Year and you know what that means...lots of stupid laws to take effect in California, land of the plastic, home of the well-meaning. The truth is, I only know of one law taking effect January 1st, and that's no texting while driving.

Maybe I'm slow. I was educated in the California public school system, "Like" is a regular part of my vocabulary, and I identify with Bridget Jones and Becky Sharp as heroines. However, it's already a law in CA that you must be "hands-free" while driving, ie., you can't have your phone in your hand. Now, I don't know about you, but a NEW law adding that you can't text seems...I don't know...unnecessary?

So, let's see, we can still afford eggs because the chicken hokey pokey (they have to be able to turn themselves about) law doesn't take effect yet. You know, I buy organic eggs, so this is no skin off my nose, but do all the poor people know that these free-wheeling chickens don't come cheap? Just asking.

It's now illegal to forge a "clean air act" bumper sticker for your Prius -- hence making the old Prius, with the sticker that lets you drive in the commuter lane, more valuable. I think it's sort of funny the idea that a do-gooder, driving a Prius, would cheat on the sticker. But also that a bumper sticker might prove more valuable than the actual vehicle. I can pass you in my SUV with all my offspring in because I'm so eligible! ACK!

Smart car drivers can now use the commuter lane. Which is good because then they can pass everyone and give us all a good laugh -- sort of like a parade! (They're like motorcycles with a roof, only way less cool.)

Finally, if you're selling your car on the street (like they do by Stanford University on the El Camino Real) the police can impound your vehicle because you are NOT a licensed dealer. Bad, bad private seller!

Go ahead. Laugh at our stupidity, but be warned. Californians can't afford California anymore, and we're bringing our idiocy to a state near you!

And seriously? The Smart Car should come with a warning. It is seriously emasculating. I'm not a Harley girl, but if given a choice between a guy on a bike and one of these...well, you be the judge.

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posted at 1:39 AM  
  Comments (11)
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At 8:34 AM, Blogger Pam S. said...

Love it. My favorite lines:

"Go ahead. Laugh at our stupidity, but be warned. Californians can't afford California anymore, and we're bringing our idiocy to a state near you!"

Happy New Year, Kristin!

At 9:43 AM, Blogger Jaime Wright said...

Hmmm ... well here in Wisconsin we can still smoke in public places (and kill the non-smokers around us), we can get up to at least 6 DUI's before they consider taking your license (there may be a Federal law that says something about 3 strikes, but we like our beer here in WI, so we kind of ignore that one), AND cow tipping is the State pasttime. I think each state has the wierdoms ... at least yours are more cultured! :) LOL

At 12:25 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

Jaime, but it's cold there. They can't think straight. what's there excuse here, Arnold?

Pam, it's not funny, do you see that blue map expanding across the country? That's us Californians who can't afford to be here any longer. Some of us are still hanging on by the hair of a chinny-chin-chins. : )

At 12:26 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

I just woke up. And I haven't downed my first cup of java yet...please excuse the typos. Though it does prove my point about the CA educational system.

At 3:56 PM, Blogger Betsy said...

On our trip to beautiful Coronado last week, we were surprised by the traffic sign messages about no texting while driving starting Jan 1. Duh! I figured most people would know that it isn't a good idea.

At 11:31 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

I know, wouldn't it be nice if we could just have common sense and not a LAW for everything. Sigh.

At 2:50 AM, Blogger Scraproni: Adventures of Single Woman said...

Having laws does not mean that people who can read do read them. Some have selective blindness even for road signs. And its not just in USA its also happens in Down Under

At 10:21 PM, Blogger Julie Carobini said...

Omgosh, those "Dumb" cars are hysterical!!! They're like a bad cartoon waiting to happen--only anyone mowed over by the road runner will, sadly, probably not show up in the next frame.

At 1:03 AM, Blogger Kristin said...

Julie, there are quite a few of those Smart cars here already. They look ridiculous!

At 4:40 PM, Blogger Leslie said...


I moved from California to Texas ;)

But seriously, when I was visiting my mom for Christmas, I saw the digital signs about the Jan. 1 law about texting (they made a law about that?!?!) and started laughing. Or would have if it wasn't almost midnight and raining and everyone was going past the speed limit.

I'd thought only Texans were dumb enough to speed in the rain.

I have a friend who has a theory about why Californians are so crazy: A hundred years ago the people who needed to wander and move (wander-lust) just moved West whenever they felt like it. But then they got to California and couldn't go any further, and so they and their descendants are slowly going mad because they can't keep exploring.

At 12:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...



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The Authors
Kristin Billerbeck
Kristin Billerbeck is a proud Californian, wife, mother of four, and connoisseur of the irrelevant. She writes Christian Chick Lit; where she finds need for most of the useless facts lulling about in her head.

Colleen Coble

Colleen Coble writes romantic suspense with a strong atmospheric element. A lovable animal of some kind--usually a dog--always populates her novels. She can be bribed with DeBrand mocha truffles.

Denise Hunter

Denise Hunter writes women's fiction and love stories with a strong emotional element. Her husband says he provides her with all her romantic material, but Denise insists a good imagination helps too.

Diann Hunt

Diann Hunt writes romantic comedy and humorous women's fiction. She has been happily married forever, loves her family, chocolate, her friends, chocolate, her dog, and well, chocolate.

Hannah Alexander

Cheryl Hodde writes romantic medical suspense under the pen name of Hannah Alexander, using all the input she can get from her husband, Mel, for the medical expertise. For fun she hikes and reads. Out of guilt, she rescues discarded cats. She and Mel are presently taking orders from four pampered strays.

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