One of our favorite spots to visit is located two hours from our house. An Inn there was having a special this week, so I decided it was a good time for me to hole up in the Inn and get some writing done--since I have a May deadline.
You will be proud to know that, though I am directionally-challenged, I made it to the Inn without a hitch--despite a detour. I wish I could say the story ends there. But then again, you know me well enough by now to know that, well, it doesn't.
Okay, so I get to the Inn, register with Perky Patty behind the Registration desk, then drive my car to the next building over and take my suitcase up to the second floor to my room. Then I go back out to the car to get my "food" bag.
I'm feeling energetic and independent, being off on this little trip by myself and all, so I decide to throw in a little exercise and take the steps down instead of the elevator. It's sort of out of the way, but I figure the more steps I get in, the better, right?
Well, let me tell you, those steps do not end. Walking, walking, walking. I'm like a hamster in a maze--like an Israelite wandering aimlessly in the wilderness. There has to be a way out! Finally, I find it--a way out, only it's the wrong way. You won't believe this, but I actually end up in a different building. And who do I see but Perky Patty.
We laugh when we see each other and I don't even have to tell her I'm lost. Wonder why? Anyway, she gives me a map to the building and says something, but I have no idea what. The whole time I'm thinking I wish I'd brought my glasses with me because the map is useless. We say our goodbyes, and I head back into the wilderness.
By now my feet are aching. I've sprouted two bunions and an ingrown toenail.
I walk another ten miles and just when I think I'll never see my car again, I stop and ask a sweet little Mennonite woman for help. She tells me where the elevator is. With renewed hope, I go down it and where do you think it brings me out? Yep, right back to Perky Patty. By now she's convinced I have a serious problem. I do. There's a blister on the back of my right foot, and I think I'll have to buy a new car.
When all is said and done, a kind young man comes out of his office and ESCORTS me back to my destination. I've stayed in my room ever since.
I think my kids are saving up to buy me a handheld GPS. Couldn't hurt, right?
13 Comments:
I can't say I understand how you feel because direction has never been a real problem for me.
Hope you can put your feet up and relax after all that tramping around. I also hope you can laugh about it when your feet stop hurting :)
Remember this phrase the next time you get hungry:
room service.
Good luck!
ROTFLOL, Suzanne!
As someone who took a 10 hour road trip with you, let's just say I'm not surprised.
Oh Diann! So, so good! Well...not the directions part, but the telling us about it part.
Life is much more fun when we can laugh at ourselves.
HAHA! Priceless =)
Lol...don't hate me Kristin, but I read the first half of this and thought it was you, haha...
Diann, you crack me up. Are we sisters? Because I've gotten lost most of my LIFE! I bet we could pull an all-nighter with the stories (I'd be willing to bring chocolate :)
Thanks for making me laugh!
So....what did you and your escort chat about on the way to your car, haha? :-) Situations like this I usually start rambling and then later have to realize I probably sounded...um.....less like the Masters level graduate that I am.
Times like this I wonder if Jesus is crackin' up or shaking his head in wonder. :-)
LOL! You and my mother! But the real question is this...If you had a hand held GPS would you be able to work it our would one of your kids have to be with you? :)
Too funny! Good luck getting out of there to go home ;-)
LOL! You're right, Bev. I did blab too much when he walked me out. Every time I've seen them since, they keep asking if I'm lost. :-)
Sue, that's a good question. Fortunately, hubby joined me now, and he has a good sense of direction. *g*
Happy writing! :)
There's got to be a scene in one of your future books that you can put this situation!
That is SOOO funny, Di! Only you!
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