Hi all! Allow me to introduce a fabulous writer, Angela Benson. She's here as our guest blogger today. Make her feel welcome! Kristin
Siblings.
I've been thinking a lot about siblings these days. I only have one -- a brother -- though there were many times growing up when I thought there were six of him. The boy was a holy terror, sometimes without the holy.
I have the funniest memories of him growing up. Though he's three years younger than I am, when he was around five or six, he used to beat me up. He did it because I'd never hit him back. Well, I woke up to that pretty quickly, and accidently socked him one day. Guess what? My brother's love of hitting his big sister suddenly faded.
My brother used to torture me with dessert. Like a normal person, I would eat my dessert immediately after the meal. Not my brother. He'd save his for later that night when I had none. Then he'd sit in front of me eating his, waiting for me to ask for a bite so he could deny me. I wish I could say I never asked, but I always did.
As we grew older, I seemed to get the upper hand on my little brother. My mom worked two jobs when we were kids, so when I was old enough, she gave me cooking chores. My first dish was fried chicken. How hard could it be? I'd seen my mother cook it often. So I fried this chicken. It's looked golden brown on the outside but I wondered about the inside. I didn't know but I knew how to find out. I served my good-looking chicken to my brother. As I watched him take his first bite and saw the streams of blood flowing out, I concluded the chicken wasn't quite done yet. Guess what? I never had to cook again. Why? Because my brother refused to eat anything else I cooked. That bloody chicken ended it for him.
To be honest, I didn't lose any sleep about not cooking. What kid wants to cook? What kid wants to do any chores around the house? Not me. I soon figured out how to evade all chores: pretend I was reading or doing homework. You see, my mom was a strong proponent of getting a good education. Unfortunately for my brother, he never figured this out so he did a LOT of chores. SOmetimes I felt sorry for him and wanted to clue him in on my chore evasion strategy, but I couldn't trust him not to tell mom. So I watched him cook (yes, he cooks), clean, and iron, while I pretended to study.
As we grew older, things got a bit more serious. I remember an incident that occurred when I was off at college and my brother was still home. He called me to share a secret about a problem he was facing. He made me promise not to tell our mother. Of course, I promised. Unfortunately, as soon as we hung up the phone, I dialed my mom and told her the secret. Now I love my brother, but there was no way I could keep that secret. To this day, I don't remember what the secret was, I just remember feeling that it was too big for me too handle. It took my brother a while to get over this one and share another secret with me, but he did.
One of the dearest memories I have about my brother is the day I realized he'd become an adult with deep insights to share to help me with my problems. I remember pulling the phone away from my ear and looking it, while thinking, "When did my little brother become a man?" A very preciuos moment indeed.
I cherish my relationship with my brother, as you can probably tell from these stories. Because we live 13 hours apart, we don't see each other often, but we talk several times a week. There's a richness to our relationship because it has its ups and downs and because it seems to grow stronger and deeper through those ups and downs.
I like to read about relationships that remind me of me and my brother. I love to read about people caring for each other, through the good times and the bad. The bumps on the relationship road only make the relationship more dear. I like to think that I'm a relationship writer. In my latest book, The Amen Sisters, the primary relationship is between twin sisters, Dawn and Fracine Amen. I enjoyed watching those women love, fight, grow and love again. They argue and make-up in much the same way that my brother and I did, and still do.
Siblings. Mine's a keeper. I hope you know yours are, too.
Angela Benson is the author of The Amen Sisters ($13.99, Grand Central Publishing). "The Amen Sisters tells the story of sexual sin and the far-reaching consequences of that sin.. .Ms. Benson aptly captures both the passion and pain that folks bottle up in their lives, and the importance of dealing with situations as they arise. Kudos to Ms. Benson for dealing with one of the last remaining taboo topics in todayís church in such a straightforward and compassionate manner." -FallenAngelReviews.com
You can find Angela on the web at http://www.angelabenson.com
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14 Comments:
Thanks for joining us today, Angela! I enjoyed reading about your special relationship with your brother.
Great post, Angela! In my case, I bullied my little sister until she had me pinned up against the closet door. Whoa. You can imagine what thoughts were going through my head. I left her alone after that.
Amazing post Angela! I am the youngest sister and so I can relate to your brother's plight. My sisters used to make me do stuff that always resulted in me getting hurt--like jumping off swings. Oh, my mother would give it to them bad when I got hurt, but they kept doing it.
Now, being the youngest isn't so bad. I will be the last to turn 40. I only have a few strands of gray hair, whereas, my other sisters have been coloring their hair for years. But there is a sad part to it too, because when I turn 40 next July, it's like the end of an era. All of us will have reached middle-age. We're all married with families, so no more acting irresponsibly. And some of our kids are in college now. My middle sister is an empty nester during the school year.
It's amazing how the passing of time gives you a different perspective on things. When we were kids we did our best to avoid each other, now we cherish our time together.
Best of luck with the tour and your book. See you down the line.
Cheryl
Denise, my thanks go to you and the other "girls"--Diann, Kristin and Colleen--for allowing me to visit. This is my first blog tour so I'm pretty much overwhelmed by the graciousness of the hosts at each stop.
LOL, Dorothy! I have that image in my mind. You and my little brother--why do you push us beyond our limts?
I'm off to the day job now. I'll stop by later to respond to comments and questions.
Enjoy our day!
Angela
Cheryl, we must have been writing our posts at the same time and you pressed the Publish key first.
You and your sisters sound like a great bunch. I can imagine you have great fun when you're together. I've often wondered what it would be like to have sisters. Alas, I have to experience it through the books.
Ah, such great stories, Angela! I had THREE younger brothers. One of my favorite memories of my brother Randy, who has gone on to heave ahead of me, was the day I wanted to ride his new motorcycle. It was a smallish one but he was so proud of it. He reluctantly agreed to let me ride it because he didn't think I could get it started. He made me wear a helmet just in case. A good thing he did because I got it started and promptly drove it right into a fence.
I was knocked out and as I came to, I heard Randy swear as he was carrying me inside. It was only the "d" word but it shocked me because he said it in front of my mother. That showed me how much he loved me that he would be upset enough to let that word slip. LOL
Randy was a great guy and I have two other brothers who are just as special and I treasure them. My baby brother Dave has been bringing me anything he can think of to help me with the pain of shingles I'm suffering with this week. And my other baby brother Rick is sending me another TENS unit. My parents have been hovering too. When I found out I had shingles, the first person I wanted was my mother. Even when you're 55, when you hurt, you want mommy. LOL
Oh Angela, this brings memories. I'll have to condense this or it'll be a book.
My older brother and I had a fallen out many years ago. We allowed months then years to come between us.
Then one month I decided I needed to try to find him. I didn't know where he lived, didn't know if he was even alive. I had this heavy heart and just didn't know what to do next.
Then the phone rang and it was the Orange County Coroner from S. Cal. and he called to say that my brother had died that day.
I later learned that my brother had tried to find me but didn't know how either. He'd paid someone $100 to find me and they couldn't.
I went down there to help clean out his house and I found my picture in his top dresser drawer. His girlfriend said that he'd talk about me all the time.
I finally got to say my peace with him laying in that little room in the funeral home.
By the way, I also learned that he'd accepted Christ too.
So, please, please.....if you have a loved one and you aren't on good terms with them, make it right before it's too late.
I have a brother that is 13 months younger than me, and your post brought back so many good memories! We were super close during high school and college, and that closeness remains to this day. No matter how long we go between visits, we seem to reconnect almost instantly when we are together.
Brothers are very special folks! My "little" brother is awesome!
Kim
Oh my gosh, these stories are making me cry. It's Friday, I don't want to cry on Friday! Angela, excellent post, it is so amazing how siblings can become estranged after the proximity of youth. I hope this gives someone the motivation to call their family today! It's like a Hallmark commercial.
Speaking of Hallmark, Angie Hunt's book, "The Note" is a Hallmark movie on this weekend!!!
Angela:
I have just one sister, who's four years older. I swear that we've never argued a day in our lives.
Great post, Angela! Thanks for sharing with us and helping us remember when. :-)
God's blessings on your writing! Your book sounds great!!!
I've just finished reading all the posts and the stories about siblings. Like Kristin, I have tears in my eyes. Oh, Rhonda, what a poignant story. Your advice is so on target.
And, Jim, not one argument? I believe you, but I don't believe you. :) Not one?
Great story Angela...loved it and it reminds me that I need to call home and check on my youngest brother.
xoxo
Angela, great posting. Brings back a lot of similar memories for me being the big sister to four siblings.
Loved the title of your book. I'll be on the lookout for it!
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