I have a confession to make. Though I managed good grades in school and am, in fact, a professional writer, I cannot read legal documents.
Doesn't matter how many times I read the same sentence. My readings go something like this. Now, therefore, for and in consideration of the promises, terms, covenants and conditions set forth herein, and for the good and valuable consideration , the receipt and sufficiency of which blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I go back and start the sentence again and even so, I cannot make heads or tails of it.
No offense to all you attorneys out there, but legalese, shmegalese. If you have to use a different language, why not pig latin? I-way eak-spay at-thay. It's almost as if-- ahem--you don't want us to understand it. Because, correct me if I'm wrong, isn't the purpose of language communication? The only thing legal documents communicate to me is You are a stupid ignorant fool. Step away from the document and consult an attorney.
Thank God for my agent who tells me what I'm signing. Nothing makes me feel more stupid than a legal document--except maybe an algebra text book. Please tell me I'm not alone.
PS The photo is a snapshot of my four handsome men taken in Frankenmuth, MI this summer.