Girls Write Out
Sunday, September 13, 2009

I have a confession to make. Though I managed good grades in school and am, in fact, a professional writer, I cannot read legal documents.

Doesn't matter how many times I read the same sentence. My readings go something like this. Now, therefore, for and in consideration of the promises, terms, covenants and conditions set forth herein, and for the good and valuable consideration , the receipt and sufficiency of which blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I go back and start the sentence again and even so, I cannot make heads or tails of it.

No offense to all you attorneys out there, but legalese, shmegalese. If you have to use a different language, why not pig latin? I-way eak-spay at-thay. It's almost as if-- ahem--you don't want us to understand it. Because, correct me if I'm wrong, isn't the purpose of language communication? The only thing legal documents communicate to me is You are a stupid ignorant fool. Step away from the document and consult an attorney.

Thank God for my agent who tells me what I'm signing. Nothing makes me feel more stupid than a legal document--except maybe an algebra text book. Please tell me I'm not alone.

PS The photo is a snapshot of my four handsome men taken in Frankenmuth, MI this summer.
Denise Hunter  
posted at 9:11 PM  
  Comments (11)
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At 6:06 AM, Blogger Timothy Fish said...

I'm sure you are not alone, but for me personally--I'm not an attorney, but I enjoy reading the occassional legal document. Although, I will confess that I don't always read the EULA before installing software. I also enjoyed Algebra.

At 6:51 AM, Blogger Diann Hunt said...

You're not alone, D. I used to be a paralegal and I still can't figure it out!

Great picture of the guys!!! I cannot believe your boys are getting so big!

At 7:11 AM, Blogger Lisa Jordan said...

Great picture, Denise! A very handsome family.

As for legalese, I'm there with you, sister. They need a concise writing class...just say it. :-)

At 8:21 AM, Blogger Colleen Coble said...

what handsome guys!!

i'm with you, D. It's all Greek to me. I'd say Latin but I actually too three years of that. LOL

At 10:08 AM, Blogger Sue said...

You are not alone... I hit the blah, blah, blah part long before you did in that sentence - lol

At 11:16 AM, Blogger Denise Hunter said...

LOL Sue!

I wonder if they have a class in reading legalese in law school. Or maybe a semester. :-/

At 5:06 PM, Blogger Tonya Kappes said...

I can only dream of what a contract looks like. I would do anything to give a shot at reading one!
Great family pic!

At 5:23 PM, Blogger Beth said...

I don't think even the lawyers can understand those documents. They're just better at pretending they can than the rest of us.

At 7:28 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

Believe it or not, I'm actually good at legalese. I think it comes from forging all my mother's notes in high school. Okay, not ALL of them.

Your guys are SOO handsome!

At 7:51 PM, Blogger Leticia said...

Oh no, you are definitely not alone. I think you really have to be an attorney to interpret those forms. Which, of course, we would have to pay to do.

But I still read all the documents and try to at least get the jist of what it is saying.

At 9:05 PM, Blogger Cheri said...

Absolutely agree! In college, I specialized in becoming a legal secretary. Way back then, you could not make one mistake or you had to start all over again.
Typing a legal document of several pages is extremely boring!

One day, on a letter (not a document), I had written the letter and before the signature had typed what should have been "assistant district attorney" above where he would sign it. I noticed I had made a mistake on Assistant so whited it out, but forgot to go back to correct it.

He brought me back the letter and thought it would be better if I changed it. I had written, "Ass Associate Attorney". I was mortified!! I learned a lesson that day to try and read it again, and then again.


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The Authors
Kristin Billerbeck
Kristin Billerbeck is a proud Californian, wife, mother of four, and connoisseur of the irrelevant. She writes Christian Chick Lit; where she finds need for most of the useless facts lulling about in her head.

Colleen Coble

Colleen Coble writes romantic suspense with a strong atmospheric element. A lovable animal of some kind--usually a dog--always populates her novels. She can be bribed with DeBrand mocha truffles.

Denise Hunter

Denise Hunter writes women's fiction and love stories with a strong emotional element. Her husband says he provides her with all her romantic material, but Denise insists a good imagination helps too.

Diann Hunt

Diann Hunt writes romantic comedy and humorous women's fiction. She has been happily married forever, loves her family, chocolate, her friends, chocolate, her dog, and well, chocolate.

Hannah Alexander

Cheryl Hodde writes romantic medical suspense under the pen name of Hannah Alexander, using all the input she can get from her husband, Mel, for the medical expertise. For fun she hikes and reads. Out of guilt, she rescues discarded cats. She and Mel are presently taking orders from four pampered strays.

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