I have a confession to make. Though I managed good grades in school and am, in fact, a professional writer, I cannot read legal documents.
Doesn't matter how many times I read the same sentence. My readings go something like this. Now, therefore, for and in consideration of the promises, terms, covenants and conditions set forth herein, and for the good and valuable consideration , the receipt and sufficiency of which blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I go back and start the sentence again and even so, I cannot make heads or tails of it.
No offense to all you attorneys out there, but legalese, shmegalese. If you have to use a different language, why not pig latin? I-way eak-spay at-thay. It's almost as if-- ahem--you don't want us to understand it. Because, correct me if I'm wrong, isn't the purpose of language communication? The only thing legal documents communicate to me is You are a stupid ignorant fool. Step away from the document and consult an attorney.
Thank God for my agent who tells me what I'm signing. Nothing makes me feel more stupid than a legal document--except maybe an algebra text book. Please tell me I'm not alone.
PS The photo is a snapshot of my four handsome men taken in Frankenmuth, MI this summer.
11 Comments:
I'm sure you are not alone, but for me personally--I'm not an attorney, but I enjoy reading the occassional legal document. Although, I will confess that I don't always read the EULA before installing software. I also enjoyed Algebra.
You're not alone, D. I used to be a paralegal and I still can't figure it out!
Great picture of the guys!!! I cannot believe your boys are getting so big!
Great picture, Denise! A very handsome family.
As for legalese, I'm there with you, sister. They need a concise writing class...just say it. :-)
what handsome guys!!
i'm with you, D. It's all Greek to me. I'd say Latin but I actually too three years of that. LOL
You are not alone... I hit the blah, blah, blah part long before you did in that sentence - lol
LOL Sue!
I wonder if they have a class in reading legalese in law school. Or maybe a semester. :-/
I can only dream of what a contract looks like. I would do anything to give a shot at reading one!
Great family pic!
I don't think even the lawyers can understand those documents. They're just better at pretending they can than the rest of us.
Believe it or not, I'm actually good at legalese. I think it comes from forging all my mother's notes in high school. Okay, not ALL of them.
Your guys are SOO handsome!
Oh no, you are definitely not alone. I think you really have to be an attorney to interpret those forms. Which, of course, we would have to pay to do.
But I still read all the documents and try to at least get the jist of what it is saying.
Absolutely agree! In college, I specialized in becoming a legal secretary. Way back then, you could not make one mistake or you had to start all over again.
Typing a legal document of several pages is extremely boring!
One day, on a letter (not a document), I had written the letter and before the signature had typed what should have been "assistant district attorney" above where he would sign it. I noticed I had made a mistake on Assistant so whited it out, but forgot to go back to correct it.
He brought me back the letter and thought it would be better if I changed it. I had written, "Ass Associate Attorney". I was mortified!! I learned a lesson that day to try and read it again, and then again.
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