Girls Write Out
Wednesday, April 14, 2010

I have three small holes in my stomach. Please don't be harsh, we all have our secrets.

Just so you know, I didn't request them. They came with that whole hysterectomy package. They're not supposed to be there and we're waiting for them to close. I suppose I could stick a cute little ring in one of them before it closes over and sport a little belly button ring, but then you have to have a belly button to do that. I no longer have one.

My doctor calls me Eve.

While I'm spilling my guts (okay, that was really bad but I just couldn't help myself), I may as well tell you, the doctor said I needed to put peroxide in those little holes and pack them with gauze. And . . . . since I can't do that myself because of the awkward angle, she wanted my husband to do it.

Now, I love my husband, I really do. But well, you know how I've confessed to you that I have absolutely no grace and elegance, though I wish I did? Let me just say he was formed from the same cloth.

On our first date, he whacked me up side the head with an umbrella and knocked me in the leg with a case of pop. I wanted to say, "Look, if you don't want to go out with me again, just say so." But I kept silent and here we are thirty-five years later, looking at these little holes and wondering what we're going to do about them.

He either fills the holes or uses me as a lawn ornament.

The good news is hubby has done a wonderful job so far. He's so proud, I think I saw him filling out an application for the nursing school here in town. I'm thankful for all he's doing, but I doubt I'll recommend him. My head still aches from that umbrella.

So let's be honest here. If YOUR husband had to take care of an ouchie on you, how would you feel about it?

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Diann Hunt  
posted at 9:21 PM  
  Comments (13)
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At 9:57 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

Well, I'd see if I could hire a nurse. So you're better off than me. LOL

At 10:33 PM, Blogger Peggy Blann Phifer said...

I'd deal with it because he's compassionate. Clumsy, but compassionate. Heavy-handed, but compassionate. Ah, yes, even impatient, but compassionate.

He's a dear man.

But reading what you wrote reminds me of years ago whem my mother was pretty much unable to do much for herself, Daddy would give her sponge baths. Picture this: Daddy was 6' 2", huge hands. Mom was 5' nothing, petite and fragile.

I went to spend a week or so with them in Florida every year. When it came time for her sponge bath (my turn) she would almost literally purr. Her comment went something like "Oh, theres no touch as gentle as another woman's touch."

That simple statement gave me the full image of Daddy's sponge baths. :)

At 10:41 PM, Blogger Sabrina L. Fox said...

OH DIANN!!! Ahhh...I would hate it. LOL. I have modesty issues and would probably rather have a stranger do it. Not sure why that is, but it just is. Not to mention if there was blood involved my hubby would probably pass out. Seriously.

But good for your hubby for doing a great job. :)Glad you're on the mend. And hey, if you get a belly button ring you'll have to let us know.

At 10:50 PM, Blogger Beverly said...

My husband's first hint he was in for a long haul with me was when in the labor and delivery room when the nurse said, "Grab her leg so she can push." I would have cracked up, but it wasn't the right time. :-)

Since then, he has cleaned wounds, stripped drains, and well ... stripped more drains. He didn't think he could, but he did. And I didn't mind, though minding wouldn't have changed anything. He was actually quite gentle. It is only whenever I think something is swollen or looks odd that I want to whack him -- he can never see it. :-)

So, my poor husband ... he is in for the long haul. The scary part was when my then 3 year old wanted to help him strip drains and change bandages. I just couldn't say no to that cherub face and spirit that so badly wanted to help! She did okay, too. :-)

At 12:18 AM, Blogger Hannah Alexander said...

I trust my husband to get the job done, especially since he did an excellent job suturing his own mother's facial wounds when she took a header into the gravel and really messed up her face a couple of nights ago. Mel just happened to be on duty in the ER when his brother brought her in.

But seriously? It's harder on Mel to treat family. So I actually prefer to have a woman do it. A woman's touch is gentle. Mel is gentle, but I do feel less self-conscious with a woman.

At 2:19 AM, Blogger Ruthie said...

When I had major back surgery 10 years ago, my husband not only had to care for the incision wound but he also had to bathe me. I could not bend over for 6 weeks, so only the top third of my body in front was all I could manage on my own. The only thing I would NOT let him do and will NEVER allow him to do is wash my face. My skin is too fragile and he's rather heavy-handed. Other than my face, I trust him to care for me in any way that I need. He's a true gift! (BTW, Today...Thurs., 4/ our 32nd wedding anniversary. Guess I'll keep him. *smile*)

At 4:28 AM, Blogger Diann Hunt said...

Happy Anniversary, Ruthie!!!!

I loved reading everyone's comments. Lest you conjure up an image that could harm the faint of heart, let me just say the area hubby is working on isn't gross, just sort of strange. No blood involved. I would be hard pressed to let him work on me if blood were involved--especially MY blood. ;-)

So sweet of our men to care for us that way! The sweet, uncomplaining care hubby has given me has made me love him all the more! :-)

At 4:57 AM, Blogger SketchGirl said...

I'm still single. So my dad is the main man in my life and he's an ex-paramedic so he takes really great care of me when I've sick care.

At 9:03 AM, Blogger Sarah said...

My husband is very patient and compassionate, so he's pretty good when I'm sick.

However, it is a joke between us that whenever I have an ouchy, he's sure to find it and make it worse. For example, when I get my flu shot, he will absentmindedly rub my arm every chance he gets. :)

At 9:06 AM, Blogger Jaime said...

I'd feel great about it - he'd do probably 12 hours of research to fully understand everything and then delve in with the skill of a master surgeon. He's wierd that way. Good at everything he does. Sigh. Wish it would rub off on me! LOL

Enjoying packing your gut ;)

At 10:59 AM, Blogger Ane Mulligan said...

Scared silly!! He was NOT blessed with the gift of mercy. He's one of those suck-it-up guys and I'm, well, let's just say I like to milk things for all they're worth. Unfortunately, most aren't worth that much.

However, for the sake of honesty, when I was sick a few weeks ago, he was very solicitous. I scared him silly, I was so ill. :D

At 11:45 AM, Blogger Colleen Coble said...

Dave is awesome! He is a pretty good nurse when need be.

At 5:25 PM, Blogger Katy McKenna said...

Di, Hey, my mama doesn't have a belly button, either! When I had my hysterectomy at age 37, I had four or five other problems surgically fixed at the same time. Plus a tummy tuck. Now I have a manufactured belly button, since my original one was whacked off with the extra skin. :)

My hubby became an expert at emptying the drains that hung from my bod when I came home from hosp. He did not flinch, as far as I could tell.

My WORST story is from when my son Scott, then 12, came home from the hosp after surgery for a burst appendix. I was charged with pushing a Q-tip coated stick into his incision FOUR times per day for 2 weeks, to release any infection built up at the site. It was VERY PAINFUL for my son, but he was stoic. One night, I got him settled in bed and a few minutes later he called out to me.

"Mom, I hate to say it, but you forgot to stab me."

I will NEVER forget that as long as I live! What a kid.


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The Authors
Kristin Billerbeck
Kristin Billerbeck is a proud Californian, wife, mother of four, and connoisseur of the irrelevant. She writes Christian Chick Lit; where she finds need for most of the useless facts lulling about in her head.

Colleen Coble

Colleen Coble writes romantic suspense with a strong atmospheric element. A lovable animal of some kind--usually a dog--always populates her novels. She can be bribed with DeBrand mocha truffles.

Denise Hunter

Denise Hunter writes women's fiction and love stories with a strong emotional element. Her husband says he provides her with all her romantic material, but Denise insists a good imagination helps too.

Diann Hunt

Diann Hunt writes romantic comedy and humorous women's fiction. She has been happily married forever, loves her family, chocolate, her friends, chocolate, her dog, and well, chocolate.

Hannah Alexander

Cheryl Hodde writes romantic medical suspense under the pen name of Hannah Alexander, using all the input she can get from her husband, Mel, for the medical expertise. For fun she hikes and reads. Out of guilt, she rescues discarded cats. She and Mel are presently taking orders from four pampered strays.

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