Girls Write Out
Wednesday, February 01, 2006

WHO’S TRAINED HERE?

My daughter’s dachshund rings a bell. That’s right. Every time she needs to go outside and take care of business, she rings a bell.

Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m wondering who’s training whom here.

Lulu--the dog--has the life. Okay, she sleeps in her cage at night, but once the family wakes up, she rings her bell, goes outside, comes back in and eats breakfast, romps with the kids, goes back and eats some more, rings her bell, plays, eats, rings her bell. Well, you get the idea.

Let me just say you haven’t lived until you’ve seen this dog ring her bell, and my daughter come running.

But who am I to talk?

Our Shih Tzu, Nocchi (short for Pinocchio--hey, the kids named her!) dances around me to let me know she needs to go outside. I clip a chain to her collar so she can go out unchaperoned (don’t you wish you could do that with your teenagers?). I no sooner step inside the house when she barks. Barks, as in, “I’m finished. May I please come in?”

Now, I don’t know if it’s a middle-age thing or what, but sometimes it just makes me mad that she barks and I jump. So, I linger in the kitchen a moment or two, making her wait. She barks again. This time saying, “Excuse me, did you not here me? Let me in.”

My feet stand firm.

Bark three carries a growl: “Let me in, and I mean now.”

Bark four says, “I’m reporting you to the Humane Society if you don’t get out here this instant.”

Okay, by now the neighbors are looking, so I have to concede. But I’m not happy about it.

I let her back inside, she jumps up on MY sofa, mind you, circles three times and settles into a nice nap.

She’s in control and we both know it, and that just burns me up. I mean, why do I let a thirteen-year-old dog with three teeth boss me around like that? Do you see her tongue in the picture? With so few teeth, she can’t keep her tongue tucked politely away. In other words, she has no control over her tongue, yet she controls me!

But just so you know, I refuse--repeat--REFUSE to give her a doggie treat until I’m doggone good and ready.

Bark.

Okay, now I’m ready . . .
Diann Hunt  
posted at 7:08 AM  
  Comments (10)
 
 
Delicious Delicious
10 Comments:
At 9:38 AM, Blogger Robin Caroll said...

LOL....see, this is why I'm a cat person! LOLOLOL

 
At 10:15 AM, Blogger Corina Bowen said...

OH, you are so whipped! I am giggling thinking of you standing there with your hands on your hips, shaking your head no..... listening to her bark! hehe
I am betting that you have "gourmet" dog snacks..... :-)

 
At 10:16 AM, Blogger Chaos-Jamie said...

And people try to tell me my kids need a dog. Like I need another person in the house bossing me around. Besides, I'm busy being potty trained--I mean potty training my two-year-old. It's all the same: kids, dogs, cats...and we just keep inviting them into our houses.

Gluttons for punishment, I tell ya.

 
At 10:58 AM, Blogger Diann Hunt said...

You're right, Corina, I'm whipped. Still, I do NOT have gourmet dog snacks, okay? I have my limits.

Robin, a cat is looking better all the time. But I figure Nocchi is in her senior years, and we'll get through this. No new pets on the horizon. I'm too old to be trained again.

Exactly, Jamie. If you get a dog, go for a chihuahua. I hear they're not so take-charge. Stay away from the German Shepherds. They'll have you trained faster than you can say "dog biscuit."

--Di

 
At 4:19 PM, Blogger Kristin Billerbeck said...

I saw a sign that says "Dogs have owners. Cats have staff." I'd say that's true. Pets are just a lot of work. My dad has a new Black and white cocker, and she is darling, but she is so hyper, and she will climb right up on your head. I don't know but I sort of draw the line at animals as hats.

I'll stick with the cat. She's easy, but she's still a pain.

 
At 10:15 PM, Blogger Pammer said...

Well, this should tell the story. We have a dog...she is an outside dog. We also have two cats. They NEVER set foot outside unless I am carrying them. :0)

Be glad you have had her so long. None of our dogs last that long. The one before this one got out of her fence and got hit by a car. This last one...I keep letting her loose and she keeps coming back...sigh.

Hugs.

 
At 10:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I understand the dog ruling. Try having three dogs (one Yorkie, one German Shepherd mix and one Rottweiler/Lab) who rule the house. Yes, they rule..bark because I want a bite of food and you have to watch me eat it (Yorkie). Bark because a car is coming down the street (German Shepherd) and I need to go outside to watch it.
Hurry home so I can run and jump on your bed because it's more comfortable than mine (Rottweiler/Lab Mix).
Dogs like to boss.

 
At 11:01 PM, Blogger Rhonda Gibson said...

Di!

Nocchi looks just like my Shaggy boy!!! I can't believe we have almost the same dog. How fun is that?

 
At 3:44 AM, Blogger Camy Tang said...

You know, that sounds like my household! Our dog rings this string of bells attached to the door so we know when she needs to go outside, because NO WAY am I cleaning up her #1 mess from the hallway again.

However, when she demands to come inside or to be fed or whatever, I stand firm. She comes in when I say she comes in. She gets fed when I'm done eating, not before. She has resorted to drooling on my knee to try to force my hand, but I am immune to wet spots on my pants.

Camy

 
At 6:59 AM, Blogger Diann Hunt said...

LOL! Camy, good for you--standing your ground! The slobber on the knee thing shows you these creatures will resort to anything.

Rhonda, is Shaggy a Shih Tzu? They're great dogs. Very gentle. Demanding, but gentle. LOL! Actually, I think that demand thing started after she lost her teeth. Poor thing, turned her mood straight south.

--Di

 

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The Authors
Kristin Billerbeck
Kristin Billerbeck is a proud Californian, wife, mother of four, and connoisseur of the irrelevant. She writes Christian Chick Lit; where she finds need for most of the useless facts lulling about in her head.

www.KristinBillerbeck.com

Colleen Coble

Colleen Coble writes romantic suspense with a strong atmospheric element. A lovable animal of some kind--usually a dog--always populates her novels. She can be bribed with DeBrand mocha truffles.

www.ColleenCoble.com

Denise Hunter

Denise Hunter writes women's fiction and love stories with a strong emotional element. Her husband says he provides her with all her romantic material, but Denise insists a good imagination helps too.

www.DeniseHunterBooks.com

Diann Hunt

Diann Hunt writes romantic comedy and humorous women's fiction. She has been happily married forever, loves her family, chocolate, her friends, chocolate, her dog, and well, chocolate.

www.DiannHunt.com

Hannah Alexander

Cheryl Hodde writes romantic medical suspense under the pen name of Hannah Alexander, using all the input she can get from her husband, Mel, for the medical expertise. For fun she hikes and reads. Out of guilt, she rescues discarded cats. She and Mel are presently taking orders from four pampered strays.

www.HannahAlexander.com

 
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